Milestone... Crazy Chemo Done!

This is a very special post for me.  5 months ago, I started the journey down the road to being cancer free.  I was undeniably terrified and apprehensive  about what was going to happen to me, but I was determined to persevere, I was, and still am determined to be cancer free.   I hoped and prayed for the best, I hoped that after 6 treatments that the horrible cancer that had invaded my body, and upset my entire world, would be gone. I prayed that I wouldn't be too sick, that I would tolerate the chemo well, and of course that by some serious miracle, my hair wouldn't fall out... Okay, so 2 our of 3 ain't bad.  6 treatments later, here I am, a little worse for the wear (most definitely bald), and most certainly not feeling like myself, however, I can no longer feel the tumor in my breast, the horrific pain that kept me up most nights, and made me uncomfortable during my waking hours, is gone.  The signs of the cancer invading the skin, are gone!

Friday (05-09-14) was my 1st cancer milestone.  The 1st stage of my cancer treatment COMPLETE!  I'm sure it's hard to imagine, but I couldn't wait to get there on Friday morning.  I couldn't wait to be hooked up to those tubes, I just wanted to be done.

I was so thankful for a good nights sleep on Thursday night- the last 3 treatments I've undergone have been undertaken on -0- hours of sleep (which resulted in water-works in the doctors office prior to my chemo started- a tired baby is a cranky baby!).  It was great to make it through my consultation with the oncologist without bursting into tears over the fact that my ankles were swollen to 4 times their normal size, and the aching suspicion that I have that one of my finger nails may be getting ready to fall off (I've never hoped so much that I am wrong about something!).

As the poison (May I take this opportunity to add how ironic I think it is that "poison" would save my life?) trickled into my veins, I looked around that huge room, full of cancer warriors, the room where I have spent so many hours over the last 5 months.... almost 50.  I couldn't help but get a little nostalgic (I am a nostalgic, sentimental person by nature). There I sat, waiting to be finished with my treatment, surrounded by some of the kindest, caring, funniest, and feistiest people that I have ever met, people that I never would have met had it not been for cancer.  And then it hit me, I am a member of this of brave, feisty,  determined club.   I couldn't help but smile- I am in seriously good company.  CEO's of the worlds largest companies have nothing on a cancer warrior- only a real bad ass can take on cancer- this isn't for the faint of heart or weak of nature.  Believe it or not, over the last 18 weeks, I've had some pretty remarkable moments in the chemo room.  I've made a few friends, I've smiled, I've laughed, I've heard amazing stories, and I've celebrated a few "last chemo's".

Cancer survivors are a very elite group of people.  People of all ages, genders, and nationalities who can say that stared cancer in the eye, and won.  And as I'm finding out, there is a definite kinship for fellow warriors.  I have yet to meet a survivor who wasn't willing to offer words of encouragement, or share a funny story.  When you're in the throes of battle, those words are extremely crucial to survival.  They make you stop and think, "I can definitely do this!" and they make you feel like you're not alone.

There comes a certain peace in being surrounded by the words of others who are in the same place that you are, or who have been there.  I love reading the comments posted on my blog- part of it is knowing that someone is reading my blog, but it's also hearing that someone else is feeling just like I do right at that very point in time- that maybe the crazy chemo induced thoughts that race through my garbled mind on a daily basis aren't so strange.  While each of the cancer warriors are different, we're all alike in a lot of ways.  Most of us have the same thoughts, concerns, and fears, and we all strive for the same thing, to be healthy, and cancer-free.

Have a beautiful day fellow cancer warriors, and know that you've brightened my world....