Go! Get Out of Here and Stay Out!

Today was a day of bittersweet good-byes.  The place where my journey with cancer started, the place where I heard those 3 terrible words (YOU HAVE CANCER) for the first time, also became the place where my cancer ended, because technically, I am now cancer free.

Today I met with my breast surgeon, and her team for the very last time.  I felt like she was breaking up with me as one of the girls handed my envelope of films.  I was told they're a souvenir, and they are, they are a reminder of what I just fought.   She reviewed my amended (yes, there were errors) pathology report and smiled from ear to ear as she told me that she got it all, and that she couldn't have been more pleased with the results of surgery and chemo, checked out my surgery site, gave me a huge hug and then she said to me, "Go!  Get out of here, and stay out!  I don't wanna see you back here!  (One of the things that I really loved about my surgeon was her sassy, kick ass attitude, and it came out again today as we said our good-bye!)  And frankly, as much as I adore Dr. Kemp and her staff, those words were absolute music to my ears.  I couldn't be happier to be here, in this spot, right now!  I've still got a long way to go (there's the boob-less issue to take care of, and the 6 weeks of rads to kill off any pesky lingering cells, and my remaining 9 Herceptin treatments, but after all of this other business, that ain't nothing!)

I also parted with 2 of my drain tubes today.  Those, just for the record, were not bittersweet good-byes.  But for those of you who endure this after me, just know that having drain tubes removed is absolutely, positively nothing- I swear!  (As is my usual protocol before undergoing any type of procedure, I did a Google search yesterday to find out what  I was in for as far as having those tubes removed.  One survivor wrote that it was so bad she couldn't stand it, and recommended that you should take pain pills 1 hour prior to the appointment.  So, I was a tad nervous about how it was going to feel, but I didn't take the pain pills.)  I still have 2 drain tubes to contend with for another week, but on a positive note- I have been cleared for physical therapy type exercises on my arms and shoulders.  While I have a pretty good range of motion right now, there are a few things that are pulling and that feel a little weird.  I'm hoping these exercises take care of that- because when I go back next week, they're going to start inflating me... look out!

The past 10 days have been a little long, and more painful that I was anticipating.  I had to remind myself at least 100 times that this is temporary, and that pain is weakness leaving the body; believe it or not, that really helped me to think of it that way.  I've obviously got more to do to be recovered, but I'm definitely making progress, however slow it may be, and that is what will get me through this!   There were challenges that I wasn't ready for, but then I am not a person who handles slowing down and taking it easy well.  It's just not in my nature to be incapacitated.   But it is definitely in my nature to adapt to whatever situation comes way, and that is how I survived the last 10 days.  And this house arrest bullshit- is going to make me crazy.

However, I made it, and I'm moving on to the next phase... I survived the surgery, and the rather uncomfortable days following it.  And, my sense of humor is still intact... see?  (If I obey the house arrest rules, there may be a lot more pictures like the one on the left!)